8 responses

  1. kris
    August 26, 2010

    I am noticing now?

    In between the lines of heavy vetting promises?

    That there is no email address attached to this blog. How am I to continue to harass and annoy and stalk you if you do not come out in the open where I can reach you?

    You will just have to blog more.

    Yours truly,



  2. Homeland Security
    August 26, 2010

    The Secretary requires that subsequent communications about al-Qaeda girdle monkeys, which may or may not be armed with jello shots, be pre-vetted and cleared through Homeland Security before publication, in the interest of national security. That is all.


  3. kris
    August 26, 2010

    OK, see?

    I am like a promotional genius up in here!

    The jello jump?

    It is a fucking GO!

    Let me know your schedule.

    I am off to buy whipped cream.


  4. Marian
    August 26, 2010

    monkeys in girdles? what the hell is a girdle? any plots involving girdles are clearly anti-american and must be stopped. thank goodness the authorities are on this. i am relieved. thank you for the information.

    jello jumping? i'm in.


  5. sheaintheavy
    August 26, 2010

    Man, I have been way too busy mothering to catch up on my current events.
    I feel better knowing I have clear view of what's happening in the world. Not to mention a safe haven to go to!
    Also? If you need me to make refreshment for the Naked Jello Jump, I'd be more than happy.
    I can bring Whipped Cream too.


  6. WTH am I Doing?
    August 26, 2010

    Oooh, I've seen the zombie ant fungus on the discovery channel. I had not considered that as an explanation of American politics. But you may just have a point there.

    Also? When is the naked lime Jell-o jump happening?


  7. kris
    August 26, 2010

    OK, how am I still the only commenter on this post?

    You, sir?

    Are not doing enough to promote yourself.

    I am thinking you should do a naked jello jump. And I will pass out business cards. I will be clothed, as I? Do not need more publicity of the whorish sort.

    That would be all sorts of awesome.

    Lime jello.

    Yes, definitely lime.

    Let's make this happen!


  8. kris
    August 24, 2010

    OK, first off . . . I would like to order one of these girdle monkeys. Six-inch long small wiggly monkey in my pants, possibly with a banana?

    What could go wrong with that genius plan, I ask you?

    If the world is indeed ending?

    That's how I want to go out.

    Monkey blissful.

    Here's hoping your next commenter?

    Is more politically astute than I am.



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