Shock White House Resignation – Michelle steps down as First Lady

Another shock resignation has hit the Obama Administration, just weeks before an expected political train wreck in the mid-term elections.

Michelle Obama has resigned as First Lady and is returning to the 2008 Presidential campaign when she was a key strategist for rising young superstar Sen. Barack Obama.

An insider says, “Michelle absolutely loved the campaigning, the frocks, going to seven or eight events every day, being loved and adored by screaming crowds everywhere she went. She was a superstar and married to The One who would change America. She was Mrs. Hope. She loved it.”

But being the First Lady is not nearly as much fun or suited to Michelle’s need to be adored.

“In private, Michelle has said that being First Lady actually sucks, and that she is way too smart and too pretty to stay in a dead-end job that she hates.”

One of the biggest drawbacks of being First Lady is having to sleep with the increasingly grumpy and unpopular President, hence her desire to go back in time, when “campaign sex with Barack was insanely hot”.

“When we were running for the White House, we did it in 5-star hotels, on trains, planes, buses, limos … even the Clinton’s bedroom once when they weren’t home. But now it’s stress city — the war this or the economy that. When Barack’s Presidential seal fell off, that sort of summed up how things have been going in the bedroom.”

There is growing speculation that Oprah Winfrey is the front runner to replace Michelle as First Lady. Oprah has enormous wealth and clout with women in the 24-54 demographic, and she has supported Obama from the beginning.

Insiders say the President has given mixed messages on Oprah as First Lady. “On the one hand, he sees an enormous upside because of her popularity and media clout. On the other hand, he does not like fat chicks.”

Michelle’s resignation is the fifth by a senior White House official in the last two months.

It is unclear whether First Children Sasha and Malia, and First Dog Bo, will remain in their positions or choose to follow their Mom back to the vibrant 2008 campaign trail.

Republican strategists, meanwhile, are rubbing their hands in glee.

“The Administration is trying to downplay the significance of Michelle’s resignation as First Lady, but they are living in fear. If Oprah doesn’t get the job of First Lady, there is every indication that either Bill or Hillary Clinton will apply for it. Bill has already priced a sex change, and he sees a lot of benefits in having the operation, both personally and politically.”

2 Responses to “Shock White House Resignation – Michelle steps down as First Lady”

  1. kris says:

    I see your own personal campaign to appear as a guest on Oprah’s show is in full swing.


    • hams says:

      Oprah’s people have been in touch. They say I am high on their guest list, just behind Brett Favre and Dick Cheney.

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